18 Funny Homework Answers from Kids Who Are Going Places

These snarky students are smart alecks at heart

  • Holiday Humor

When you're a  student , homework is an unavoidable fact of life. Kids these days often face hours of homework assignments each week—it's no wonder that some of their answers turn out a little snarky. 

Lucky for us, the funniest homework answers often end up on the Internet, courtesy of amused parents or teachers . Some of these students are being deliberately funny; others may very well be trying ( and failing ) to find the right answer. We think every single one of them deserves a place in the  Smart Aleck Hall of Fame .

Extra Credit for the Snazzy Drawing

"Show your thinking?" 

Challenge accepted!

"What do you need to find?"

"The answer."

Thank you, Captain Obvious. That's really helpful .

Just Following the Directions

The assignment said to write "< or >" so that's exactly what this student did. What's the problem here?

You know what they say — never trust a fart. 

For those who may not know, "shart" is slang for what happens when you do trust a fart. Use your imagination.

That's Just Your Opinion

Some say Tony is disciplined and loves music. Others say Tony is probably a huge nerd. No shame in that game, Tony!

Seems Legit

Why do we know anything , Sharon? Because we're SMART!

Somebody give this kid a scholarship.

Don't Be Silly, Kid

Pssh. "Tedison" is not even a real name... but we totally wish it was.

Failing Biology and Acing Zoology

Sure, this student doesn't know the difference between an ovary and a fallopian tube, but check out that kick-butt tiger face! Points for creativity?

Find X? No problem, there it is. It was right there all along! How did you miss that, Teach?

The Metric System Is Confusing

We can partially blame the American system of measurement for this one, but this student also gets bonus points for the sheer genius of the  utterly sarcastic remark. 

So Wrong, Yet So Right

Again, this answer isn't even wrong. It's technically totally, 100% correct! Maybe the teacher needs to rethink those test questions.

(Nah, not really.)

"April Ham Lincoln."

Remember what the great former president April Ham Lincoln once said: "Four scones and seven beers ago."

Wait, that's not right. Or is it?

An Example of Being Too Honest

This sounds like something out of "Breaking Bad." We really, REALLY hope this is a little kid spelling error situation.

She Must Work at the School in #13

Some teachers will go above and beyond to bond with their students, but this is ridiculous. Get your act together, Mrs. Edwards!

I See How It Is at Your House...

This is an actual quote from a first grade student. How did the teacher not die laughing?!

Comedian Chris Rock once famously said, "As a father, you have only one job to do: Keep your daughter off the pole!"

Clearly, this kid's family has some work to do in that department.

Hold Up There, Buddy

From "I like to play football" to "I am a god" in just a few short sentences. That's quite a leap!

Tell the truth: this is Tom Brady 's homework from 30 years ago, isn't it?

That's Extremely Literal

The difference between six and eight IS that eight is more curly. That's not silly – it's just accurate.

Okay, so I never did that well in math class either. Sue me.

She Deserves Extra Credit

We'll end on a positive note. This student followed directions to the letter and did exactly what she was told to do:

"Write a story to go with this picture. Use capitals and punctuation."

She not only created a funny story about this really, really weird picture of a cat overseeing a pile of hot dogs, but she also used CAPITALS and lots of exclamation points. Who cares what the teacher thought — this kid deserves an A+!

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53 hilarious homework answers from kids that are so wrong, they’re right.

by Megan Zander

Megan Zander

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53 Hilarious Homework Answers From Kids That Are so Wrong, They're Right

Since the dawn of time, kids have hated homework. And can you blame them? It’s a total drag — but there are ways to keep things interesting.

Case in point: These hilarious homework answers. Whether the kids who completed these assignments are dead serious or just pulling their teacher’s leg, we can’t help but applaud their efforts.

Originally published June 2016. Updated June 2017.  

Technically correct

funny child homework

But really, they were just following the directions very, very closely.

Girl code is sacred

funny child homework

This child is a genius, and so is her mother.

A for effort

funny child homework

Even this sad stick figure knows this isn’t the best answer.

This kid clearly loved ‘The Lion King’

funny child homework

With such a clear setup, it’s kind of hard to resist this one… 

Animal lover

funny child homework

This student is 100 percent correct.

Captain obvious

funny child homework

If you’re going to try a cheeky answer, at least make sure you spell it correctly.

Stickler for details

funny child homework

Probably safe to assume this student will not end up being the teacher’s pet.

True or false

funny child homework

What takes longer, studying for the exam or practicing how to write “fruse”?

Math can solve anything

funny child homework

Short, sweet and sadly wrong.

Not very nice

funny child homework

Going to go out on a limb and assume this student isn’t in the marching band.

Environmentalist in the making

funny child homework

Give the kid an A for knowing at such a young age what so many adults can’t seem to comprehend. 

Funny, but wrong

funny child homework

If they can’t hack college, they’ve got a bright future as a stand-up comedian. 

The fierce female form

funny child homework

Failed the biology exam, nailed the tiger drawing.

Easier to spot than Waldo

funny child homework

All the single ladies

funny child homework

You just know that after she graded this paper that teacher had this song stuck in her head for the rest of the night.

Good book, bad answer

funny child homework

Great book, bad answer.

The metric system is tough

funny child homework

If only conversions really were this simple.

Now add the head bob

funny child homework

Haddaway approves.

When less isn’t more

funny child homework

It’s not technically wrong, but it sure isn’t correct either.

An expansive answer

funny child homework

Peter’s math teacher may not find it funny, but his philosophy teacher would likely approve.

This kid’s a survivor

funny child homework

If the zombies ever attack, this is the kid you want on your team.

Confidence is key

funny child homework

It may not be the answer the teacher was looking for , but that doesn’t mean it’s not true.

A hobbit-approved answer

funny child homework

Gollum would probably find this answer to be precious.

funny child homework

Be right back, putting Tedison and Cate on the list of potential baby names.

Minor clarification

funny child homework

Snow shovels are the new controversial topic.

Getting punny

funny child homework

A sad day for the birds of science community.

You didn’t specify which anagram

funny child homework

I’ll explain it when you’re older.

Literary critic in the making

funny child homework

It’s great to see a professional’s thought processes.

An etiquette lesson

funny child homework

Rumor has it, they also don’t poop or burp.

Drawing isn’t for everyone

funny child homework

A blob is whatever you want it to be.

A blast from the past

funny child homework

It doesn’t get more accurate than this.

The lesser known President Lincoln

funny child homework

Four score and seven years ago, our fathers invented sliced deli meat.

Celebrity guest appearance

funny child homework

Kids know the darndest things.

The loose change debate

funny child homework

You can’t blame her for not wanting to carry around pennies in this day and age.

School electives

funny child homework

What happened to taking home ec?

Slight spelling mistake

funny child homework

One letter can really change a word.

Sunday school blunder

funny child homework

The history books depict it a little differently.

Celebrity gossip

funny child homework

But he hides it so well!

Getting philosophical

funny child homework

The film industry begs to differ.

Homework wars

funny child homework

It’s impossible to avoid spoilers these days…

A little too creative

funny child homework

Weird questions deserve weird answers.

Angry confusion

funny child homework

Bubble letters don’t cushion the blow.

Homework reveals a lot

funny child homework

Dad probably won’t be putting this one on the fridge.

Learning more about the public school system

funny child homework

And Mrs. Edwards, too.

A+ imagination, D- following directions

funny child homework

With little studying comes great banana car.

The dark side of recess

funny child homework

Some children have different dreams.

Empty commands

funny child homework

Now if you had said brother…

The shape naming game

funny child homework

One-upping the teacher

funny child homework

Sometimes, answers are better left unsaid.

Freudian slip

funny child homework

Compliments to the president

funny child homework

This “Letter to Elected Official” assignment says it all: About your war against terrorism? I like what you did there.

Spelling bee fail

funny child homework

Apparently, there was more than one “correct” answer.

Best answer ever

funny child homework

By referencing the Wounded Warrior Project  the student just became the teacher.

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More stories from parenting, these new harry potter ‘little people’ bring magical fun to mini witches & wizards, country music singer kane brown explains the sweet way his 4-year-old helps wife katelyn during her third pregnancy, donald trump took a trial break to support son barron trump in this major milestone, céline dion’s twins look so grown up in rare backstage photo with another musical a-lister, justin timberlake & jessica biel’s son silas is preparing for a childhood milestone — & his little brother might not be happy about it.

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Just something (creative)

22 hilarious homework answers from brilliant kids. #12 made me laugh so hard, LOL!

funny child homework

Remember when you were a kid and your teacher assigned you homework for the weekend? Obviously you were not happy about it, but you just had to get the job done before Monday.

The following kids approached their homework in a totally different way: some of them used their irreverent sense of humor, and even their teacher had a good laugh, some took things way too literally, and some others simply answered the tedious questions in the simplest way possible (literally!).

Anyway, the following 22 homework answers from kids have one thing in common: they are absolutely hilarious!

If you like this post, share it with your friends!

1. Which is the best estimate for the length of a football?

via: nickmom.com

2. Use your fingers, or copy from your friend

via: reddit.com

3. Draw your favorite part of the mass

via: imgur.com

4. After all, the math is right

via: reddit.com

6. We can’t blame him…

via: reddit.com

7. At least he’s a honest kid

via: reddit.com

10. How easy

via: reddit.com

© 2013-2018 Justsomething.co

funny child homework

26 of the funniest answers children have written on homework assignments

Kids really do say the darndest things, but they also write them down sometimes, too.

We scoured Reddit and Imgur for the most popular posts about children's homework assignments gone awry.

And though we can't guarantee that all of these are real, they're definitely worth a read. Enjoy.

Little Lola really nailed the capitals and punctuation for this cat picture.

funny child homework

Source: mike_pants/Reddit

This kid knows a lot about Justin Bieber, or should I say “Justin Beaver.”

funny child homework

Source: Powpow33/Imgur

“My friend’s (awesome) six-year-old son is autistic and takes instructions literally,” said this Reddit user.

funny child homework

Source: snowbird311/Reddit

This kid really stopped caring about multiplication tables.

funny child homework

Source: magnesiumm/Reddit

Under "Gases," this kid called out her father's flatulence problem.

funny child homework

Source: LittleBabyDuck/Reddit

This kid doesn't have confidence problems.

funny child homework


"How I solved Problem 8 is I thought about it."

funny child homework

Source:  jacksonPollack/Reddit

We're a little scared too, to be honest.

funny child homework

Source:  paige12123/Reddit

This second grader isn't wrong.

funny child homework

Reddit:  iHearYouLike/Reddit

This Reddit user teased: "Checking my son's homework when suddenly..."

funny child homework

Source: aldennh/Reddit

Apparently, this anonymous Imgur user's son doesn't like Mass at all.

funny child homework

Source: Imgur

To be honest, we can't think of any other strategies either.

funny child homework

"User your fingers" or "Use your head."

Source: Virian/Reddit

T is for...

funny child homework

Source: rbrown34/Reddit

funny child homework

Source:  FrEsH_MiNt/Reddit

One kid learning to write English letters, according to the Reddit user, got bored writing "H."

funny child homework

Source:  Im_that_stupid/Reddit

A future Walt Whitman.

funny child homework

Source:  wilso10684/Reddit

This five-year-old believes you should always treat your pets humanely.

funny child homework

Source:  Rcrowley32/Imgur

"Friend's kid's homework," this Reddit user said. "I think he gave a good answer. Pennies suck."

funny child homework

Source:  rerational/Reddit

At least he's honest.

funny child homework

Source:  allenme213/Reddit

"My son, the consummate smart-ass," this Reddit user wrote. "I think third grade math is boring him."

funny child homework

Source:  flaggfox/Reddit

"An accurate depiction of mornings in our household as drawn by my six year old," this Reddit user said.

funny child homework

Source:  geni91782/Reddit

"Nobody was making bracelets," this smart kid replied. Fair.

funny child homework

Source:  IranianGenius/Reddit

This seven year old made her parent proud by asking for $100 million.

funny child homework

Source:  frinkhutz/Reddit

These homework instructions were taken a little too literally.

funny child homework

Source:  EddieLomax/Reddit

"My sister taught math to 4th graders in China," this Imgur user explained. "Honest mistake."

funny child homework

Source:  troubleshootermcgavin/Imgur

And finally, this is every "Star Wars" fan's dream child.

funny child homework

Source:  cwaterbottom/Reddit

funny child homework

  • Main content

15 of the most hilarious homework answers given by smart-ass students

Sage Anderson

It's a truth universally acknowledged by all current and former students that homework sucks. A lot. 

After a long, grueling day of school, most kids have negative levels motivation left to do even more work. It's definitely not encouraging to hear that it may not even make us any smarter .  

But some homework answers do show that students can get pretty clever — either out of laziness, misunderstanding, or just a great sense of humor. If you can't get your teacher to give you an A, you can try and eke out some points on a technicality. Or make them laugh.  

Here are the best answers that, at the very least, get points for creativity. 

1. I mean, same.

Honesty in my son's homework from funny

2. He loved it before it was cool! 

A tiny piece of writing, all about the love of books and reading ...from my son’s homework when he was six. #NationalWritingDay pic.twitter.com/ppYQZoSjoN — Laura (@Mum_Reader) June 27, 2018

3. The academic equivalent of "talk to the hand." 

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Rachel Marie (@lularachel919) on Oct 2, 2017 at 8:09pm PDT

4. Are we humans, or are we wine moms? 

View this post on Instagram A post shared by I Love My Teacher (@i_love_my_teacher_1102) on Jun 23, 2018 at 10:41pm PDT

5. He's not technically wrong.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Idk Tbh (@kyrowolf11) on Feb 21, 2018 at 12:58am PST

6. Ooh, sick burn. 

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Brandy (@brando01122) on Apr 6, 2018 at 2:29pm PDT

7. All women are queens, so jot that down. 

Youthful wisdom. from funny

8. At least now we know who let the dogs out. 

A kennel has 75 dogs in total from funnytestanswers

9. Yeah! Get dunked on, Tom! 

Something I did several days ago from funnytestanswers

10. Why do teachers even bother asking these questions anyways?

y'all i'm crying my brother's homework answers are so funny 😩😩😩 pic.twitter.com/LaAzIRysxF — worthless penis sucker (@emosnack) September 2, 2016

11. I'd give him points for boldness. 

My son’s assignment found hanging at school when I went to the Fall parent-teacher conference. from KidsAreFuckingStupid

12. Well, I thought it was a nice name. 

My child’s answer to her math homework. from KidsAreFuckingStupid

13. Clever, and culturally relevant! 

Covfefe from funnytestanswers

14. Maybe not everyone . 

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Bailey (@baileyybrewerrr) on May 16, 2014 at 11:42am PDT

15. Would it have counted if she traced her hand? 

View this post on Instagram A post shared by LoveWhatMatters.com (@lovewhatmatters) on Apr 10, 2017 at 11:14am PDT

Everyone gets an A+ for effort. 

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17 Homework Memes That Tell It Like It Is

Because the only one that really likes homework is the dog.


Homework—love it or hate it, it’s a universal experience for most teachers (and students). And while both sides of the homework debate have merit, why not just accept it and have a good laugh? Here, 17 of our favorite homework memes.

1. Dang, they’re on to us.

17 Homework Memes

2. Pulling. Hair. Out.

17 Homework Memes

3. Life is hard.

Willy Wonka

4. Listen to Yoda.

Yoda from Star Wars

5. The REAL reason teachers give homework.


6. Can I get a witness?

Willy Wonka 2

7. Homework as dirty word?

funny child homework

8. Making a clean getaway.

funny child homework

9. Teacher reality.

funny child homework

10. Oh yeah, we know that look.

funny child homework

11. Help me understand.

funny child homework

12. If they ask me one more time…

funny child homework

13. Another teacher reality.

Nobody ever

14. Umm, umm, umm.

funny child homework

15. Parenting reality.

funny child homework

16. Say what?!?

funny child homework

17. It’s not my fault, really.


What are your favorite homework memes? Link us up in the comments!

funny child homework

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  • Back To School

We Can't Stop Laughing at These Kids' Hilarious Homework Blunders

funny child homework

After a long day of school — whether virtual or in-person — the idea of homework can drain the life out of both parents and children (but mostly parents, obviously). Kids will be kids though, so even in something as mundane as homework, children somehow find a way to make us laugh uncontrollably.

Whether they were due to hilarious spelling errors, kid-drawings that could be interpreted as, um, other (inappropriate) things, or just the ol' Common Core blunder , the following homework assignments failed so hard that we can't stop laughing.

Confusing Common Core

We're as stumped about Common Core as this kiddo was.

Literal Interpretation

Literal Interpretation

I mean, it says "draw a picture."

Follows Directions Well

Also very literally.

Friends For the Win

That's an A+ in girl power right there.

Capitals and Punctuation

Looks like Lola deserves an A for this one!

Show Your Thinking

Well, he did , didn't he?

Natural Resources Problem Solving

This is conservation at its finest.

Stray Doodles

He just wanted to represent the number four with the very best gingerbread men he could draw.

Holy Homework

A strong ego, for sure.

Simple Subtraction

Open-ended response.

"Eating bacon!"

What Makes You Happy?

What Makes You Happy?

Hot cockolate — erm, chocolate — makes us happy, too.

Show How You Know the Answer

Why have three rainbows when you could have 10?

Multiple Choice

We think that this is a perfectly acceptable answer regarding tornado safety.

Alphabetical Order

You've really got to specify further on these things.

I Like Fractioned Butts and I Cannot Lie

Anything that is naturally split in half is made for fractions, no?

What a Disaster

Hey, we think a Sharknado is a disaster for sure.

Reality Check

This kid is going to be a small circle of friends kind of person . . .

Stuck on an Island

That's some serious (dark) thinking ahead.

  • Parenting Humor
  • Little Kids

Funny Tweets About The Misery Of Helping Your Kids With Math Homework

Senior Reporter, HuffPost Life

You may think you left math behind when you finished school. But if you have children, you’re in for a rude awakening.

Many parents have used Twitter to lament the days when their children ask for help with their math homework. Even if they manage to recall the skills they once learned, that may not be helpful in the confusion of common core math.

Fortunately, they’ve also found humor in the situation. We’ve rounded up 35 tweets that sum up parents’ frustrations with their kids’ math homework.

10-year-old: Can you help me with my math homework? Me: Yes. 10: *points to the problem* Me: No. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 9, 2021
I reassure my kids as I help them with their math homework by telling them I took calculus so I think I know a thing or two about being completely confused. — Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 10, 2021
I don't scare easily but I'm petrified when I see my 3rd grader walking towards me with his math homework & an inquisitive look on his face. — Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) December 13, 2016
Here’s a little song I wrote about helping kids with their Common Core Math homework, it’s called “We Just Have to Multiply Two Single Digits Why the Fuck Do We Need to Draw a Parallelogram“ and a one and a two — Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) March 14, 2019
Okay, I’m not going to ask how you got there because I won’t understand anyway but the answer book says it’s correct so good job. - me helping my 6yo with his math and nailing it — Life at Tiffany’s (@lifeattiffanys) February 14, 2019
I used to be an atheist until my 8YO started asking for help with her math homework — Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) September 27, 2021
My only real argument for having multiple children is that the older one will eventually be able to help the younger one with Common Core math. — SpacedMom (@copymama) April 27, 2021
Store clerk: May I help you? Me: I hope so. Sweetie go get your math homework, this nice woman is going to help us. — Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 13, 2018
I’ve decided to let my son only watch TV for 3 more weeks because it’ll be better than the both of us crying over common core math — That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) March 25, 2020
What wine pairs well with Common Core math? — Jessie (@mommajessiec) August 24, 2020
10YR OLD: dad, can you help me with my math homework? ME: *throws smoke bomb* — Andy H. (@AndyAsAdjective) January 31, 2017
I don’t like to swear in front of my kids but I also don’t like to help them with their math homework, so I may have just angrily referred to fractions as “fucktions!” — Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) March 12, 2019
Allie has 5 oranges, she gives 3 away. How many does she have left? Common Core Math: Round up to the nearest 100, take away half. Draw a number line and count up 10. Do 15 jumping jacks while you subtract. Take away the sum of the quotient of the total to get the answer. — ThisOneSaysBOOO (@ThisOneSayz) November 4, 2019
Just got my ass handed to me by my kid's 2nd grade math homework. — Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) March 16, 2017
Can't figure out 7th grade son's math homework -- despite using his book, Google, Wikipedia, and about five wine coolers. — Steve Olivas (@steveolivas) October 27, 2016
Whenever I have to help my kids with their New New Math worksheets, I end up giving myself pep talks like some kind of Aaron Sorkin character ("I actually went to a very good school!") before I give up/google grade-school math tutorials. So that's what keeps me humble, Barbara. — Nicole Chung (@nicolesjchung) September 18, 2018
*12 comes to me with math homework 12: Can you do this? Me: Son, I got older so I wouldn't have to. — The Alex Nevil (@TheAlexNevil) October 4, 2021
Hi sweetie, doing your math homework? 2nd grader: Yes, 27 + 41 = 68 but our teacher makes us [spends 30 minutes drawing number lines, groups of ten, shaded blocks, etc.] do it this way. — Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 24, 2018
I tried to slow cook a pot roast this morning by plugging in the toaster, but sure son, let me help you with your math homework. — Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) February 16, 2018
You can’t make me cry; you’re not my daughter’s 2nd grade math homework. — Jessie (@mommajessiec) January 28, 2021
Couldn't hate 2nd grade math enough? Try having kids. — AparnaRC (@Wordesse) September 11, 2021
Let's get married and have kids so instead of going to happy hour you can make a boxed dinner while I figure out common core math homework. — Simon Holland (@simoncholland) November 3, 2016
[checking common core math] 8-year-old: Is it right? Me: Turn around. I'm definitely not going to Google this. — James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 20, 2019
school administrator: we need something to make parents feel like complete and utter dipshits in front of their children pretty much every single night. guy who invented common core math: oooh, have i got a treat for you. — JB 4Realz (@JB4Realz) September 25, 2018
Murder By Numbers is my favorite movie about helping my kids with their math homework — Sweet Momissa (@sweetmomissa) October 29, 2020
Me, to 10yo: The first step in doing your math homework is *starts crying* — Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 8, 2018
You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both. — Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) March 20, 2019
Before kids: I will never swear in front of my precious angels. After kids: WTF is this math homework?! — MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) December 13, 2017
This new math will always leave me like #fourthgrademath #commoncore pic.twitter.com/rrhEb8Yjk8 — Nicole Blades (@NicoleBlades) January 15, 2019
'You are a strong, capable and intelligent woman.' I mutter to myself, as I use my fingers to count while reviewing my kid's math homework. — Moderately Mom (@moderately_mom) November 7, 2019
One day someone will ask my kids if they ever saw their dad cry and they will think about the time with the math homework. — Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 24, 2019
13 out of 10 parents have difficulty helping their kids with Common Core math homework. — HowToBeADad (@HowToBeADad) October 2, 2017
That wasn't a typo, it's the new common core spelling. No one understands it, but it's supposed to be better for some reason. — Anecdotal Birthcontrol (@AnecdtlBrthCtrl) May 21, 2019
[homework] Child: It says "solve for X" Me: Well, look at our clock with Roman numerals on it. Child: Um. Ok. Me: What number is "X?" Child [counting]: 10. Me: Right. X is always 10. Child: OH OKAY. [writing answer] Me: Wife: You know they'll end up living at home right? — Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) January 21, 2020
*Arrives in Hell* Devil: Here, help these 5th graders with common core math — Jo Bean (@jobrowneyes) October 24, 2018

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funny child homework

75 Fun Riddles for Kids (and the Answers to Go With Them)

Some are easy, others are hard, but all will have them thinking!

preview for The Best Dad Jokes Of All Time

Animal Riddles for Kids

Funny riddles for little kids, food riddles for kids, math riddles for kids.

Sometimes it can be hard to separate riddles for kids and jokes for kids , because the answers can make you feel like you've just heard one of the corniest dad jokes . But a riddle is a statement or question that has multiple meanings and needs to be solved. (No knock-knock joke setups here.) So, even if they have a punchline, there's still some kind of wordplay involved that needs to be worked out.

If you're just getting started, these are the best riddles for kids. The list has a little of everything. There are real head-scratchers for the older kids, sidesplitting puns for the younger crowd and even a little math thrown in there. We broke them into categories, so you’ll be sure to find the right riddle for your kids.

Save this story for the next time you're waiting for a food order, stuck in the doctor's office, on a long line or any other time you need to keep a kid's mind occupied.

Tricky Riddles for Big Kids

a riddle for kids that says q what is yours but mostly used by others  a your name

Q: Give me a drink, and I will die. Feed me, and I'll get bigger. What am I? A: A fire.

Q: What word begins with E and ends with E, but only has one letter? A: Envelope.

Q: What appears once in a minute, twice in a moment, but not once in a thousand years? A: The letter "M."

Q: What has many rings but no fingers? A: A telephone.

Q: What goes up but never comes back down? A: Your age.

Q: I go all around the world, but never leave the corner. What am I? A: A stamp.

Q: If you drop a yellow hat in the Red Sea, what does it become? A: Wet.

Q: I’m always on the dinner table, but you don’t get to eat me. What am I? A: Plates and silverware.

Q: What goes in a birdbath but never gets wet? A: The bird's shadow.

Q: What two things can you never eat for breakfast? A: Lunch and dinner.

Q: If you drop me, I’m sure to crack, but smile at me and I’ll smile back. What am I? A: A mirror.

Q: What has hands and a face, but can’t hold anything or smile? A: A clock.

Q: You’ll find me in Mercury, Earth, Mars and Jupiter, but not in Venus or Neptune. What am I? A: The letter “R.”

Q: I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I? A: Your breath.

Q: I have cities, but no houses. I have forests, but no trees. I have water, but no fish. What am I? A: A map.

Q: What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it? A: A promise.

Q: What is yours but mostly used by others? A: Your name.

Q: Which question can you never answer "yes" to? A: "Are you asleep?"

Q: What's something that, the more you take, the more you leave behind? A: Footsteps.

a riddle for kids that says q i grow down as i grow up what am i a a goose goose feathers are called down

Q: A rooster is sitting on the roof of a barn facing west. If it laid an egg, would the egg roll to the north or to the south? A: It's impossible — roosters don't lay eggs.

Q: A cowgirl road into town on Friday. Three days later, she left on Friday. How is that possible? A: Friday is the name of her horse.

Q: What kind of lion never roars? A: A dandelion.

Q: What has a thousand needles but cannot sew? A: A porcupine.

Q: Without me Thanksgiving and Christmas are incomplete, when I’m on the table everyone tends to overeat. What am I? A: Turkey.

Q: What’s bright orange with green on top and sounds like a parrot? A: A carrot.

Q: Why do bees have sticky hair? A: Because they use their honeycombs.

Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth? A: A gummy bear.

Q: What’s black, white and blue? A: A sad zebra.

Q: An elephant in Africa is called Lala. An elephant in Asia is called Lulu. What do you call an elephant in Antarctica? A: Lost.

Q: I jump when I walk and sit when I stand. What am I? A: Kangaroo.

Q: I grow down as I grow up. What am I? A: A goose. Goose feathers are called down.

Q: I’m the father of fruits. What am I? A: A papa-ya.

a riddle for kids that says q i’m tall when i’m young and i’m short when i’m old what am i a a candle

Q: What has a bottom at the top? A: Legs.

Q: Cats have four, bugs have four, but school has six. What are they? A: Letters.

Q: Sam's parents have three kids. Their names are Huey, Dewey, and _____? A: Sam!

Q: Nobody empties me, but I never stay full for long. What am I? A: The moon.

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? A: Frostbite.

Q: What’s really easy to get into, and hard to get out of? A: Trouble.

Q: What animal can jump higher than a building? A: Any animal that can jump — buildings don’t jump, silly!

Q: Where would you take a sick boat? A: To the dock.

Q: What did the zero say to the eight? A: “Nice belt!”

Q: What gets wet while drying? A: A towel.

Q: I’m tall when I’m young, and I’m short when I’m old. What am I? A: A candle.

Q: What room do ghosts avoid? A: The living room.

Q: I can be cracked or played; told or made. What am I? A: A joke!

Q: What has a head and a tail but no body? A: A coin.

Q: I sometimes run, but I cannot walk. What am I? A: Your nose.

Q: What has four fingers and a thumb but isn’t alive? A: A glove

a riddle for kids that says q what kind of room has no doors or windows  a a mushroom

Q: First, you throw away my outside and cook the inside. Then you eat my outside and throw away the inside. What am I? A: Corn.

Q: What kind of cheese is made backwards? A: Edam. Made is M-A-D-E, Edam is E-D-A-M, or "made" backwards.

Q: What has a head but no eyes, nose or mouth? A: Lettuce.

Q: I'm red and small, and I have a heart of stone. What am I? A: A cherry.

Q: When I’m ripe, I’m green, when you eat me, I’m red, and when you spit me out, I’m black. What am I? A: A watermelon.

Q: What fruit can you never cheer up? A: A blueberry.

Q: What has to be broken before you can use it? A: An egg

Q: What kind of foods are the most fun at parties? A: Fungi.

Q: What is the richest nut? A: A cash-ew.

Q: Why did the citrus tree go to the hospital? A: Lemon-aid.

Q: You cut me, slice me, dice me, and all the while, you cry. What am I? A: An onion.

Q: What kind of room has no doors or windows? A: A mushroom.

Q: What kind of apples do computers prefer? A: Macintosh.

Q: What kind of cup doesn’t hold water? A: A cupcake.

a riddle for kids that says q if two’s a company and three’s a crowd what are four and five a nine

Q: If there are seven oranges and you take three away, how many oranges do you have? A: Three, since that's how many you took.

Q: How many seconds are in a year? A: Twelve — January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...

Q: How many letters are there in the alphabet? A: There are 11: three in "the" and eight in "alphabet."

Q: Ms. Smith has four daughters. Each daughter has a brother. How many kids are there in total? A: Five, there are four daughters and one son. Each daughter has the same brother.

Q: When things go wrong, what can you always count on? A: Your fingers.

Q: What did the triangle say to the circle? A: You are pointless.

Q: You have a basket that's one foot in diameter and one foot deep. How many apples can you fit in the empty basket? A: Only one, because then it's not empty anymore.

Q: If two’s a company, and three’s a crowd, what are four and five? A: Nine!

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7, 8 (ate), 9!

Q: Four legs up, four legs down, soft in the middle, hard all around. What am I? A: A bed.

Q: A word I know, six letters it contains, remove one letter and 12 remains, what is it? A: Dozens.

Q: What month of the year has 28 days? A: All of them!

Q: The more you take, the more you leave behind. What am I? A: Footsteps.

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13 Fun Homework Ideas: The Best Ways To Make Homework Fun For Kids Quickly & Easily

Sophie Bartlett

Figuring out how to make homework fun can be a tricky task for parents.

Does it feel like you’re constantly nagging your kids to do their homework? If your answer is yes, know that we’ve all been there! It’s natural for parents to want their children to progress and do well in school, but after an entire day of paper, pencils, and books many youngsters will resist getting on with their homework – and that’s putting it mildly!

Top Tips To Make Homework Fun:

1. work together, 2. use rewards and incentives, 3. make them a snack, 4. make it visual, 5. try different learning apps, 6. set up a homework play date, 7. go outside, 8. turn it into a game, 9. let them play teacher, 10. use a timer, 11. create a special homework space, 12. remember to be positive, 13. get help if you need it.

Thankfully, there are ways of making homework less boring and that are a little bit more fun for your child. Whether they need to practice spelling, learn their times tables or revise for an important exam, our top fun homework ideas will help you magically take the ‘work’ out of homework.

Fun Homework Ideas - work together

Adults often work best in the company of others, and the same can be said of kids, so why not sit with your child while they’re studying and get on with some of your own work or life admin?

Whether you’re returning emails or doing your online banking, creating a shared workspace and modeling focused work is a great way to spend quality time together while they complete their homework. Win-win!

Quick win : While your child is tackling their fractions homework, you could sit down with them and take a look through your finances.

Rewards and incentives are great when it comes to getting your children to follow your household rules and routines, and homework is no different. Things like stickers or the promise of time on their iPad or games console for slightly older children can all work wonders in getting them to do their homework without a battle.

Quick win: For every few questions they answer they could get a minute of screen time!

Fun Homework Ideas - make them a snack

Let’s face it: A hungry child is an unfocused, unmotivated and unhappy child.

Most children come out of school ravenous, so let them nibble on a nutritious after-school snack while they get on with homework; things like popcorn, apple slices, grapes, or crackers and cheese are all great snack options.

If you’re feeling a bit more adventurous, Active for Life has a list of healthy after-school snack ideas and recipes to try.

Quick win: One of the best brain foods for kids is a nice and crispy apple! So when your child is craving something sweet just cut up an apple and let them munch away.

Help to eliminate the late night ‘Oh, I forgot to do that’, and create a weekly homework chart so your child can see what they have to do each day and check off each ‘to do’ task as it’s been completed.

Again, Pinterest has some great free printables to help keep kids organized. Get them involved by letting them color it, or decorate it with their favorite stickers, and pin it up somewhere at their height, where they will see it easily every day as a reminder. Some exciting new stationery and colorful pens might help too.

Quick win: An easy way to make homework fun is to grab a piece of paper and get your child to draw out and decorate a ‘homework chart’ consisting of 5 days. Stick it on the fridge and add a sticker to each day after they’ve done their homework, when they’ve collected 5 stickers they get a treat!

Fun Homework Ideas - try different learning apps

If your child prefers to be online, there are some great online apps around that children will have fun using, yet encourage learning too. Here are our favorite free math websites for example. Speak to your child’s teacher too and see which apps the children use in school so you can support what they’re doing at home.

Quick win: One of our favorite websites that makes homework fun is Tang Math !

Holding a homework playdate where your child can invite one of their best school buddies over to do homework together can be a great way for them to learn and make sure the work gets done, especially older children in elementary school.

Plus, it’s likely that their parents will be delighted!

Younger children may need a bit more support and guidance but can still gain a lot from the experience of learning together with a friend – think of this as a mini-educational play date for them.

Quick win: Let your child and their friend play for a while, and then get them to work through their homework with the incentive of a yummy ‘ice cream party’ when they’ve completed all of their homework.

Fun Homework Ideas - go outside

If the weather allows, create a comfortable outside study space and allow your child to do their homework outdoors.

The fresh air can help kids with their concentration if they’ve been stuck in a classroom all day, and studies also show that being outside, closer to nature, can increase productivity. The reward of a quick game of Frisbee or a kick-around of a soccer ball between tasks will help them stay motivated too.

Who said home learning had to be boring? If children enjoy what they’re learning, they’re more likely to remember what they’re being taught, so turn their learning into a fun game. Using sweets like Smarties to help with math and number work can turn the experience from a chore into a treat. If they get the right answer, they get to eat some!

Another trick that you can use when your child is learning spellings is to write them in shaving cream or in magnetic letters. It sounds simple but we can guarantee that it will make homework a lot more fun for your child.

These math games for kids and times tables games are a great place to start.

Quick win: If you’re looking for some fun homework ideas then check out this simple multiplication activity you can do at home, it’ll even get in one of your child’s five a day!

Make another fun homework game by creating your own mini-classroom and letting your child step into the role of teacher.

Have your child explain a concept to you as a teacher, as you, or their sibling, play the role of the student. This game works particularly well with subjects that require theory, like Science for example, as it will improve their understanding of the concept and build logic and reasoning skills.

Quick win: Make homework fun by getting your child to choose their favorite teddies and toys and setting them up in their own mini- classroom. Start off with registration, ‘mom’ ‘present’, ‘mr teddy’ ‘here’ etc. You’ll soon notice that your child is growing in confidence regardless of the topic as children love playing teacher!

Fun Homework Ideas - let them play

Some children may have difficulty working for prolonged periods of time without a break, so using a timer can be great for getting them to complete homework without whining. For example, if your child is given 20 math problems for homework, you can say “Complete the first 10 questions, then we’ll take a 5-minute break, then complete the next 10 questions”.

Many children will need a mental break and will work more effectively when given the opportunity to take one. At the end of the task, they get to pick an activity of their choice. If your child gets easily distracted, a timer game can work well to keep them focused on the task in hand.

Quick win: Put the timer on your phone so that your child can see the countdown while they’re working.

A special study space can make homework more fun and help motivate your child to get it done! Choose a space in your house that’s least likely to distract your child, and create simple, organized, and kid-friendly homework.

You could hang up some of their artwork above the desk, and have all their school essentials nearby so everything is close to hand.

Quick win: Make sure that they aren’t surrounded by things that will distract them. Televisions and iPads are a no go at homework time!

Remember to always be upbeat and positive about school and the importance of their homework. Give your child lots of praise and encouragement about how well they’re doing to help them stay motivated and on track.

Quick win: After every homework session, spend five minutes talking through what your child has accomplished. If you’re running out of activities to do, have a look at our list of home learning packs – all free to download.

Homework can be frustrating if your child doesn’t understand the material or gets bored easily. If your child is struggling, get them some expert help!

Quick win: Third Space Learning has plenty of advice on learning math for kids and parents but if you need more support, our primary school math tutors are easy to organize and very affordable.

Do you have students who need extra support in math? Give your students more opportunities to consolidate learning and practice skills through personalized math tutoring with their own dedicated online math tutor. Each student receives differentiated instruction designed to close their individual learning gaps, and scaffolded learning ensures every student learns at the right pace. Lessons are aligned with your state’s standards and assessments, plus you’ll receive regular reports every step of the way. Personalized one-on-one math tutoring programs are available for: – 2nd grade tutoring – 3rd grade tutoring – 4th grade tutoring – 5th grade tutoring – 6th grade tutoring – 7th grade tutoring – 8th grade tutoring Why not learn more about how it works ?

The content in this article was originally written by primary school teacher Sophie Bartlett and has since been revised and adapted for US schools by elementary math teacher Christi Kulesza.

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funny child homework

Getting kids to do their homework is a chore in and of itself. There will be questions the kids don't know how to answer, dozens of spelling mistakes, and maybe even times when even mom and dad can't figure out the solution to a problem. But what to do when a child goes rogue and answers the questions in an ahem "explicit" way?


Not on purpose, of course, but there is always that one child who doesn't quite know how to spell "clock." While it is hysterical if mom or dad catches it in time, should they miss it, they could have a lot of explaining to do at the next parent-teacher conference. 

There have always been kids who have some "interesting" interpretations of mops, scissors, and what it looks like to be sprayed with a water gun (LOL). The difference now is that parents and caregivers all have cellphones and social media to keep track of every hilarious thing their kids write down. And some of the things they come up with are … pretty hilariously inappropriate. 

Truly these are all cases of kids say the darnedest things, and hey, everyone has to be really bad at spelling and drawing until they get good. These X-rated flops are the internet's gain! Check out these amazing homework fails which go to show that parents do need to look over a child's homework before it gets submitted. From accidental curse words to anatomically correct drawings, these homework fails are the laugh every parent needs today. but honestly, these homework fails would be too cringey if these kids weren't so cute!

A Surprising Revelation

A Surprising Revelation

Whoops! This kid's totally innocent spelling mistake has some pretty terrible implications … especially for poor Veronica. As the child's mom writes in her  Instagram caption , "Wow Lucian, stay away from Veronica."

'How Many Girls Like to Play With Balls?'

'How Many Girls Like to Play With Balls?'

Truly the question of our time, how many girls do like to play with balls? We'd be willing to bet money that whoever this question writer is, he or she certainly got a quick chuckle from writing this double entendre of a prompt.

It Was Supposed to Say 'To Get in Your PJs and Go to Sleep'

It Was Supposed to Say 'To Get in Your PJs and Go to Sleep'

Oh boy, this tiny mistake has us rolling. The owner of the since-deleted Instagram account made it known that, "It was supposed to say 'to get in your PJs and go to sleep.'"

Luckily this mistake was caught before this child turned her assignment in, but think about the look on the teacher's face!

He Takes Off His What?

He Takes Off His What?

What? They meant, "He takes off his rooster" … right? We get it, the c and s sounds can be hard to master. Unfortunately for this child, much to his/her future embarrassment!

Not *Quite* a Mop

Not *Quite* a Mop

A little rhyme about this photo:

This assignment turned out to be a flop when this child misdrew a mop Their spelling is seamless, but they drew a … oh my, and now their grade is not tops.

A Creative Answer

A Creative Answer

The  Instagram mom  who posted this gem captioned this assignment, "Couldn't stop laughing after checking my son's homework." Look, learning new words is tough , OK?

Not Blaming the Dog for This One

Not Blaming the Dog for This One

Hey, at least this drawing is truthful. This little guy spoke from his heart and his heart said "Oops" when he passed gas. We especially like the tornado of gas coming from his bottom.

Just a Tiny Bug of a Problem

Just a Tiny Bug of a Problem

"That moment when you realize you need to teach your daughter how to spell 'insects,'" wrote an Instagram user who since deleted their account. Unfortunately, the top question also prompts the children to list ways that they can earn money. Yeesh !

The Thinker

The Thinker

"Judging by the little picture, #9 appears to be right. I don't think the teacher was amused though," an amused parent writes on Instagram . This parent isn't wrong though!

Just Like Mommy

Just Like Mommy

It's bad when Mom has to write a note to the teacher to explain herself the next day. Unfortunately for this mom, her daughter depicted her career working at Home Depot, as … well, something a little more adult.

Interpretive Art

Interpretive Art

This amused  Instagram  mom writes, "I can't even with this #homeworkfail. I think he is supposed to be on a seesaw?" Of course, a seesaw. We don't see anything else …

Careful With That Water Gun

Careful With That Water Gun!

This is a case of poor placement. All this little girl wanted to do was properly show her understanding of the word "drench," and now — well, now she's demonstrating something else completely. This situation definitely calls for a good eraser.

A poor scramble

A Poor Scramble

Yikes! This can't be what this little boy meant to write. What he meant is  his pen is in a goat  — wait, no! That still doesn't make sense. What's going on here, anyway?


Every little girl goes through a horse phase, but sometimes it's the spelling that trips her up. Some facts mentioned about "hores": they have other "hores" friends, and surprisingly, her dad wants a "hores, but my mom says no." Hmm.

Almost ... Doesn't Count

Almost … Doesn't Count

This one will make one do a double take. T is for what? Thank goodness for the teacher's note at the bottom! It's a little wink-wink, nudge-nudge at Mom and Dad for this confusing title.

A Little Accident

A Little Accident

As the Instagram user pointed out, this was supposed to be a drawing of someone spitting on the ground. Instead, it looks like, well, we're not sure. It could be a person balancing on a pile of rocks in rated G land. Or, it could be someone pooping. Or peeing. Or shooting rocks from some unknown place we don't want to think about. Like all great works of art, it's open to interpretation.

Technically, They're Right...

Technically, They're Right …

Listen, to be fair, there are probably quite a few parents who have one of these boxes in the fridge. And I mean, the kid isn't wrong about the shape! And as keepingupwiththevissmas noted, at least the teach got a good laugh.

The Wrong Noun

The Wrong Noun

It is a noun … just the wrong one. Oh what missing a simple letter can do. It happens all the time, but it can be awfully embarrassing, and totally hilarious when it does.

Trust Us, He Had a Different Drink In Mind

Trust Us, He Had a Different Drink in Mind

This is laugh-out-loud hysterical. Phonetically, they nailed it. In actuality …

This little one really tried and came really close, but instead, things went really awry. We can only imagine that teachers reaction.

So Close

It's definitely confusing, but that's not exactly what happens in fractions, bud. This is why it's so important to check the kid's homework before sending it back into school each morning.


The parents of this one should honestly be proud. They raised a resourceful kid. Maybe they should let them know though that cannibalism isn't really a healthy diet. Just imagine!

A Set Up

OK, looking at this question, the teach had to be trolling for funny answers right? They were totally set up to fail. Inappropriateness aside, we say the kid still should have gotten full credit.

Suspicious Leaf

Suspicious Leaf

We're sure more than a few parents were laughing at this assignment. Honestly, it probably looked pretty innocent until it got colored in green. The publisher should be able to do better though.


Not sure if I'd want to go out with one of these hats honestly. Valiant effort, kid. Poor kid. Who knew a simple, straightforward hat drawing could go left so quickly?

If This Were Anatomy Class

If This Were Anatomy Class

Props to this kid for knowing the basics at least? Though we're sure the arrow was intended to point elsewhere, we can't help but wonder what else they were expecting.

Witty As Hell

Perhaps it's not R-rated, but it sure is dark. Oh, and funny as hell. This kid has clearly made all the right connections and is thinking quite logically. They've probably watched enough cartoons to know how things work in real life.

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110 short jokes for kids and adults that are real knee-slappers

Did you ever wonder what they call people who sleep in their socks? Tiny!

Are all math puns bad? Nope. Just sum.

Sheesh. These short jokes and one-liners are seriously bad, right? You can't deny that they're also pretty hilarious. But that's the point of funny jokes and corny puns: to give you a chuckle despite how utterly cheesy they are. In fact, that's what makes them so, well , grate.

If you like dad jokes but struggle to remember the punchline, you're going to love this collection of short jokes that deliver all the laughs minus the build up.

Better yet, they aren't just for dads. Nope, moms , grandpas, kids and just about anyone else can join in the fun using one of these amusing one-liners.

To ensure that your arsenal of anecdotes is chock full, we've gathered our favorite gags to ensure that you're never without a silly pun or bad joke on deck.

You'll be a one-man comedy show with these knee-slappers that'll keep your audience giggling nonstop.

Use them as ice-breakers at a family gathering, or get your pals chuckling during the next night out. Even if you keep these treasures all to yourself, we guarantee that by the time you're done reading them, your funny bone will be thoroughly tickled.

Best one-liners

Short Jokes

  • I went shopping for a pair of camouflage pants. But I couldn't find any.
  • Bacon and eggs walk into a diner. The host says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast here.”
  • I told a chemistry joke once. I didn't get much of a reaction.
  • My dad was hit on the head with a can of soda. Luckily, it was a soft drink.
  • What do you call people who sleep in their socks? Tiny.

Short Jokes

  • I used to steal soap, but I'm clean now.
  • Why do tigers have stripes? They don't want to be spotted.
  • My boss told me to have a good day. So I didn't go to work.
  • I once got fired from a keyboard factory. They said I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
  • I used to be afraid of hurdles. But I got over it.
  • Why do dragons sleep during the day? So they can hunt knights.

Short Jokes

  • Are all math puns bad? No, just sum.
  • What does a house wear? Address.
  • I got rid of my vacuum cleaner. It was just gathering dust.
  • I excel at sleeping. In fact, I can do it with my eyes closed.
  • I used to be afraid of painting, but eventually I brushed it off.

Short Jokes

Funny jokes

  • Why shouldn't you marry a calendar? Its days are numbered.
  • Why was the broom late for school? It over-swept.
  • What did the comforter say after falling off the bed? Oh, sheet!
  • How much do you pay deer for a day's work? A hundred bucks.20

Short Jokes

  • Why don't trees watch scary movies? They get petrified.
  • What did the Dalmatian say after dinner? “Woof, that hit the spot!”
  • What kind of bug tells time? A clock roach.
  • What did one beer say to the other? It's ale good.

Short Jokes

  • What do you call coffee with a sixth sense? Déjà brew.
  • What's a llama's favorite movie? “Alpaca-lypse Now.”
  • Why shouldn't you make a dinosaur mad? Because you'll get Jurass-kicked.
  • What do math books wear under their covers? Alge-bras.
  • What do you say to an award-winning cheese? “Gouda job!”

Short Jokes

  • How do movie stars stay cool? They have many fans.
  • It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
  • Where do rabbits go for breakfast? IHOP.
  • Why did the belt get arrested? It held up a pair of pants.

Short Jokes

  • Why did the cloud stay home from school? It was feeling under the weather.
  • Why shouldn't you tell a legume your secrets? They always spill the beans.
  • Did you hear about the polite clown? It was a nice jester.
  • What do you call a crocodile wearing a vest? An investigator.

Short Jokes

 Short jokes for kids

  • What did the man say to his fingers? “I’m counting on you.”
  • How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
  • Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Summer wasn’t bad either.
  • How do pigs do their homework? With a pigpen.
  • How do you hire a horse? Put it on a ladder.

Short Jokes

  • What do pigs use in the shower? Hogwash.
  • How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste.
  • What’s the pirate’s favorite letter? The “C.”
  • What’s the best way to host a party in space? You planet.
  • What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.

Short Jokes

  • What kind of witch likes going to the beach? A sandwich.
  • What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
  • Why did the sauna go to the doctor? It wasn’t feeling so hot.
  • Why did the owl quit its job? It didn’t give a hoot.
  • How much do dead batteries cost? There should be no charge.

Short Jokes

  • Did you hear about the soap-stealing robber? He decided to come clean.
  • Why don’t people play more hide-and-seek? Because good players are hard to find.
  • What did one eye say to the other? Between us, something smells.
  • Why are astronauts so clean? They take meteor showers.
  • When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar.

Short Jokes

  • What did the hamburgers name their new baby? Patty.
  • One did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Nothing, they’re extinct.
  • Why shouldn’t you trust jungle animals? They’re always lion.
  • What’s the best way to make an egg roll? Push it.
  • Why did the leaf go to the doctor? It had a bad fall.
  • How do you make a squid laugh? Give it ten-tickles.

Short jokes for adults

Short Jokes

  • What’s a zebra? A few sizes bigger than an A.
  • I don’t like shopping centers. Once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen the mall.
  • What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
  • I used to have an addiction to the hokey pokey, but then I turned myself around.

Short Jokes

  • Why did the golfer cry? He was going through a rough patch.
  • Why did the woman throw her bills out the window? She wanted to send them via airmail.
  • What do cows do on date night? Go to the moo-vies.
  • Did you hear about the tree that went into banking? It started its own branch.
  • What happened to the archeologist who lost her job? Her career was in ruins.
  • How does a lumberjack know how many trees he’s cut down? He keeps a log.

Short Jokes

  • Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.
  • Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale? You can buy it with no strings attached.
  • Did you hear about the woman who couldn’t stop collecting magazines? She had issues.
  • Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Any idea how to drive this thing?”
  • I once made a lot of money cleaning up leaves. I was raking it in.
  • I’m not a hard drinker. I actually find it pretty easy.

Short Jokes

  • Why was the math book down in the dumps? It had a lot of problems.
  • Why do barbers make good drivers? They know a lot of short cuts.
  • Why did the elephant leave the circus? It was sick of working for peanuts.
  • Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it.

Short Jokes

  • What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag’s a plus.
  • Did you hear about the ski trip? It started off fine but went downhill fast.
  • How do you know when a computer is on a diet? It quits eating after only one byte.

Short one-liners that are actually funny

Short Jokes

  • I wanted to take a bath. But then decided to leave it where it is.
  • I’d tell you a pizza joke, but it’s probably too cheesy.
  • I try not to tell dad jokes. But when I do, he thinks they’re funny.
  • What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.
  • Why should you avoid artists? They tend to be sketchy.

Short Jokes

  • I’m afraid of elevators, so I take steps to avoid them.
  • Did you hear about the kidnapping? They woke her up.
  • My mom asked me to put the cat out. I didn’t know it was on fire.
  • What do you call a pencil with two erasers? Pointless.

Short Jokes

  • When is a pool safe for diving? It deep ends.
  • Have you ever been camping? It’s in tents.
  • I once read a book about glue. I couldn’t put it down.
  • Why shouldn't you eat a clock? It’s too time-consuming.
  • Did you hear about the car with logs for wheels? It wooden go.

Short Jokes

  • What did one playing card say to the other? I can’t deal with you.
  • Did you hear about the broken hearing aid? Wait, what?
  • What do you call a cow with bad manners? Beef jerky.
  • What kind of birds eat at the deli? Bagels.
  • Why didn’t the elf pay his rent? He was a little short.

Short Jokes

  • Why shouldn’t you eat clowns? They taste funny.
  • When does a dad joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
  • A bossy man walked into a bar. Then ordered everyone a round.
  • I only catch cold on weekdays. Probably because I have a weekend immune system.
  • Why did the roofer go to the doctor? He had shingles.

Short Jokes

Sarah is a lifestyle and entertainment reporter for TODAY who covers holidays, celebrities and everything in between.

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